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5 days of wedding anticipation

On the 5th day before my wedding...

I was awake between 2 and 3 AM, chasing thoughts around my brain. I almost got up and just got to work when I struggled to fall back asleep. I was relieved when my alarm went off at 6 AM and it was actually time for me to be awake.

I went out just before the sunrise, with the moon still fading and the mist rising above the fields in the forest preserve. Lily and I ran 3 miles and I just let my brain go. It felt good to finally match the pace of my mind with the pace of my body, although my body isn't actually as fast.

I don't feel stressed emotionally, but my body does. It's doing all kinds of funny things as I anticipate our big day this Saturday. I keep leaning into God, however I'm feeling. I bring him my racing thoughts, my physical strain and my full heart. I ask Him to help me savor every moment between now and then and to receive every gift, no matter how small. I know that this is an exquisitely special time in my life that I will never experience again and I want to drink it down and enjoy every last drop.

I enjoyed a huge gift of time at work today. I had no clients from 10:00 AM to 2:00 PM. I caught up on things from last week, checked a few more pre-wedding items off of my list and took an amazing 35 minute nap after lunch when my head was pounding and I could go no further.

I'm also enjoying my office today. I had a friend from church stop by today and I was so excited to show her my space here. I love how sunlight streams through the windows and the color is calming. Thank you God that I love where I work.


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